Thursday, February 21, 2008

Attitude Adjustment

This morning I decided to wake up early so I could have uninterrupted quiet time. I awoke at 5:30, but remained in bed until 6, because I didn't want Patricia to wake up. (If you know me, you will realize that this is an unthinkable hour for me.) Before I even got to the shower she was awake and at the bathroom. By the time I was out of the shower all three kids were there. 

Now here's where choice comes into the situation. At that moment I chose to grumble and complain that I can't even get a few minutes to myself. And that choice carries on throughout the whole day. This is not just today, but everyday I find myself trying to take time away, so that I can fill some desire of... what, I don't even know. It's like I have this idea in my head that if I do enough for myself then I will suddenly be content. How flawed is that thinking?

When Tabitha was a baby I was so happy. I LOVED the idea that someone needed me 24 hours a day. I never had a break and I was perfectly content. I didn't mind in the least if I had to stop cooking because she needed to be picked up or if cleaning had to wait, because she wanted a book read to her. I had a baby that I always dreamed of and a wonderful husband, what more could I ask for?

Some where along the line I got this insane idea that I shouldn't have to serve all the time, but that I should do things for myself. Get out and do things "without the kids". Pursue my own interests, which most often happens to be self centered interests. Things that don't often involve the children. Well, here I am, often trying to attain some sort of self fulfillment. Every night I have one to three hours of alone time after they go to sleep and yet I am not content for the most part. I see that I need to change my attitude, but it's not something that's going to happen over night. 

If you think of me, please pray that I would have a servant's heart.

Sunday, February 10, 2008

The Birthday Girl

Patricia turned one last Wednesday and I'm finally getting on here to update! She wasn't in a real picture taking mood, but that's ok.

Here she is on the verge of tears:

Posing with her siblings:

On all the kids' first birthdays it seems to have become a tradition to eat at Chevy's Mexican restaurant. We didn't want her to miss out on this yummy feast, so we made last minute plans to go there. My dad and Suzie joined us for the occasion. Patricia was the only one out of all three children, who did not cry when they sang happy birthday to her and put the sombrero on her head.

This is the fifth or so picture taken of us. We finally got the lighting right, but as you can see, some family members are tired of smiling for the camera =)

Verse for thought: "Trust in the Lord with all your heart; and lean not on your own understanding." Proverbs 3:5